高考英语书面表达评分细则解读及优秀作文赏析,本文主要内容关键词为:细则论文,高考英语论文,书面论文,评分论文,优秀作文论文,此文献不代表本站观点,内容供学术参考,文章仅供参考阅读下载。
从近几年的全国卷及各省自主命题试卷发现这样一个规律,高考书面表达大多都是半开放式写作,即指导性写作或者是控制性写作结合开放式作文的形式。一般是通过提纲、图表、图画等限定写作的内容、人称、时态和字数,允许考生自由发挥,但是发挥的空间不大。而开放式作文通常允许考生根据话题自由发挥,来表达自己独特的观点和看法。但是,开放性作文在高考中并不常见,因为命题者很难控制考生写作的内容,并给高考阅卷带来一定的难度。此外,一个明显的特点就是书信成了书面表达最常见的考查形式,笔者曾和几位研究高考命题的专家交流这一现象的成因,其中最基本的原因就是书信的实用性强,既能考查学生的基础知识,又可以考查考生的语言迁移能力,在今后的高考命题中,书信与其他文体相比仍然具有其不可替代性。
那么如何才能写出一篇高质量的书面表达呢?笔者连续多年从事高三英语教学并参加高考书面表达的阅卷工作,现把2011年阅卷的一些基本原则和高分答卷的重要特征及部分优秀例文展示如下,希望对广大考生有所帮助。
1.书写规范
书写规范包括学迹清楚,字体端正,大小写标点正确无误。一份书写规范的答卷让人读了一目了然,有助于成绩档次的提高。再说高考阅卷对质量、速度都有较严格的要求。在尽量保证质量的前提下,评阅一份答卷所允许的时间非常有限。在这种情况下,书写规范是举足轻重,不可忽视的。书写规范是书面表达的一个起码要求,也是高考高分答卷的一大特征。
2.语言流畅
语言流畅是书面表达最基本的要求之一,突出表现在语法上,尤其是动词时态的应用上。此外,同义词的恰当应用和各种句型(单复句、长短句)的交替使用是语言流畅的又一主要体现。用词、句型的多样化是一种写作的修辞手法,避免文章单调、平淡乏味,使文章更通俗流畅。在许多高分或满分答卷中,这种修辞手法时有体现。
3.中心明确
文章无论大小,总是为了告诉别人什么事情,从中说明一个道理。作者要集中说明的道理就是文章的中心。例如:2010年湖北高考书面表达就是请你根据提示,结合生活中的一个实例,用英语写一篇短文,谈谈微笑的作用。中心明确是一篇好文章至关重要的特征,这在高分答卷中,特别是满分答卷中都有不同程度的体现。
书写规范、语言流畅、中心明确是衡量一篇优秀习作的重要尺度,也是今年英语高考书面表达题高分答卷的三个重要特征。
2011年的短文写作跟去年的要求差不多,都是要结合一个例子写一个话题作文,所以这种作文一般采用议论,记叙,再总结议论的形式。但是对于此类文章,题目中并没有给出很多的汉语提示,所以对于学生来说,要做到有话可说,有文字可写,还是要扩散自己的思维,增加相关信息,只有这样,才能充实一篇文章。另外,要注意一些高级词汇句式的运用,亮点提分。写好单句,学会使用更高级的词汇和句型,如状语从句,定语从句等。还要学会使用衔接词,以使行文连贯。请看2010年和2011年高考英语真题之书面表达(湖北卷)标准范文:
(2010年)I still remember how nervous I was on my first day in the new school there years ago,when I found it difficult to follow my teacher in the first English class.The teacher spoke English throughout the class,which was totally different from the lessons I had taken before.
In the morning class the next day,the English teacher came to me while I was reading the text aloud as other students.After listening to me for a while,she gave me a big smile and said she liked my voice very much.The smile shone on the whole day and the following days.A week later,I volunteered to take charge of English study in my class.
Thanks to the comforting smile in my first morning class,I began to be confident.
(2011年)Years of school life has taught me a lot of things,of which teamwork is the most important for me.
In fact I didn't realize its importance until I was chozen monitor of my class in my senior middle school.At first I did most of the duties myself while other students cared little about class activities.As a result,I was tired out and depressed.Then I turned to my teacher and he advised me to cooperate with others.Thus I began to recognize the strengths of my classmates and have everyone do their part in class.
It is working in teams instead of on my own that has freed me of trouble and made my work more efficient.
此外,英语写作要求“形”不散“神”也不能散,这是考生在写作短文时尤其要注意的。
就英语写作来说,“形”即文章的句子,“形不散”即句与句之间要连贯,句子要有变化;“神”即文章的中心,“神不散”即要围绕一个中心进行写作。下面就简单谈谈如何做到这一点。
一、“形”不散
1.使用连词、副词、过渡词语,使句与句之间连贯。常用的连词和副词有:
(1)表并列关系的过渡词:
and,also,as well,as well as,or,too,both...and,either...or,neither...nor
(2)表递进关系的过渡词:
besides,in addition(加之,除……之外),moreover(此外,而且),what's more,what's worse
(3)表转折对比的过渡词:
but,however,yet,instead,on the other hand,on the contrary,although,different form,despite,in spite of,whereas,unlike,nevertheless,here...there,years ago...today,this...that,the former...the latter,then...now,the first...whereas the second,once...now,on the one hand...on the other hand ,some...others
(4)表原因的过渡词:
because,because of,since,as,for,now that,thanks to,due to(由于)
(5)表结果的过渡词:
so,thus,therefore,as a result,so that,thereby,hence,so...that,such...that
(6)表条件的过渡词:
if,unless,on condition that,as/so long as
(7)表时间的过渡词:
when,while,after,before,until,as soon as,later,afterwards,soon,lately,recently,since,from then on,eventually,in the mean time,then,suddenly,at the same time,next,after a while,in a few days,now,presently,finally,at last,all of a sudden,form now on,at present,immediately,the moment
(8)表换一种表达方式的过渡词:in other words,that is to say,to put it another way
(9)表进行举例说明的过渡词:for instance,for example,like,such as
(10)表陈述事实的过渡词:
in fact,actually,as a matter of fact,to tell you the truth
(11)表强调的过渡词:
certainly,indeed,above all,surely,most important,in fact,no doubt,without any doubt,truly,obviously
(12)表比较的过渡词:
like,unlike,in the same way,similarly,similar to
(13)表目的的过渡词:
for this reason,for this purpose,so that,in order to,so as to
(14)表总结的过渡词:
in a word(总之,简言之),in general,in short(总之),generally speaking,to sum up,in conclusion,in summary例如:Yesterday I got up at 7:00.I got dressed and washed myself quickly.I rushed into the livingroom.My mother was preparing breakfast.I had my breakfast at 7:30.I got my bike and went to school.
这段文字“形”是散的,句子不连贯。这样的句子只是松散地堆在一起,要使它们有机连贯,必须用一些词语把它们连接起来,就好比粒粒珍珠,只有用一条线把它们串起来后,才能变成一条美丽的项链。上段可以改为:
Yesterday I got up at 7:00.Then I got dressed and washed myself quickly.I rushed into the living-room.My mother was preparing breakfast.Later I had my breakfast at 7:30.After that I got my bike and went to school.
2.要使用多种句式,使句子有变化。在一篇文章里,既要有简单句,也要有复合句,比如恰当地使用名词性从句、定语从句、状语从句等,也可以使用各种非谓语结构、with独立结构等。例如:
On weekday's afternoon we had an hour for afterclass activities from 4:20 to 5:20.The activities are divided into three parts.One is called sports.Sports include ball games,track and field gym and so on.The second is recreation.It includes singing,dancing and performance.The third is science and technology.It consists of science reading,computer operating and experiments.
上段文章通篇用同样结构的句子,显得很死板,如果使用多种句式,使句子活跃起来,就会显得生动,有活力多了。所以,上段可以改为:
On weekday's afternoon we had an hour for afterclass activities from 4:20 to 5:20.The activities are divided into three parts.One is called sports including ball games,track and field gym and so on.Recreation is another part with singing,dancing and performance.The third is science and technology which consists of science reading,computer operating and experiments.
二、“神”不散
“神”不散的有效办法之一是利用主题句去写作。
首先,确定文章的中心,每段列出一个主题句,由主题句来反映文章的中心内容。其次,对每段的主题句展开写作,可以由若干个句子来支持各段主题句。
现在笔者结合2010年全国卷作文及两篇优秀学生习作谈一下什么样的作文才算是一篇成功的习作。2010年全国卷书面表达:
假设你是李华,曾在美国学习半年,现已回国。你想联系你的美国老师Mr.Smith,但没有其联系方式。请根据以下要点给你的美国同学Tom写一封信:
1.感谢Tom对你英语学习的帮助;
2.询问Mr.Smith的近况并索要其联系方式;
3.邀请Tom在春节期间来中国感受中国文化。
注意:
1.词数120-150;
2.可适当增加细节。
优秀例文一:
Dear Tom,
I'm Li Hua.Do you still remember me? I studied in your school for six months a couple of months ago.
I'm very grateful for your help that you gave me when I studied there.It was you who gave me a hand when I got in trouble.Without your help,my English couldn't have been improved so quickly and I couldn't have enjoyed myself so much.Do you know how everything is going on with Mr.Smith? I failed to get in touch with him after I left America.I will be very thankful if you could offer me his e-mail or telephone number.
I know that you show great interest in Chinese culture,don't you? Therefore,I feel honored to invite you to visit out country during the Spring Festival to feel our culture.I' m firmly convinced that it will be an unforgettable trip.I will be very happy if you can accept my invitation.
Looking forward to hearing from you soon.
点评:这篇作文在试评的时候专家给了29分,从语言上看这是一篇非常出色的作文。文中应用了适当的连接成分,行文流畅。还运用了许多高级词汇和固定搭配,如:“a couple of,get in touch with,show interest in,look forward to”等。此外,该考生还很好地运用了高级句式,如强调句型“It was you who gave me a hand when I got in trouble.”,定语从句“I'm very grateful for your help that you gave me when I studied there.”,以及虚拟语气“Without your help,my English couldn't have been improved so quickly and I couldn't have enjoyed myself so much.”。
优秀例文二:
Dear Tom,
I'm really glad to write to you.
How are you getting on? I returned to my motherland six months ago.I often think of the days we spent together.Besides I also appreciate it that you did me a favor on my English learning.On no account can I make such great progress without your timely help.Thank you again.Do you know how Mr.Smith is now? I feel like getting in contact with him.However,in no case can I find the address of him.Should you have the address or e-mail of him,please tell me as quickly as you can.I can't wait to write to him.
The traditional Spring Festival is around the corner.Would you like to come here to enjoy the biggest festival celebrated by us.I bet that you will have an enjoyable travel that can't be forgotten.Best wishes.
点评:习作中本来有一两处小错,笔者已经予以纠正,当时这篇习作给了27分。总的来讲,这篇习作也不失为一篇佳作,语法结构和词汇应用准确,句式灵活多样,如用到了倒装句“On no account can I make such great progress without your timely help...In no case can I find the address of him.Should you have the address or e-mail of him,please tell me as quickly as you can.”,定语从句“I often think of the days we spent together.”,非谓语结构“Would you like to come here to enjoy the biggest festival celebrated by us.”。此外,文章中有效地运用了连接成分,全文结构紧凑,在一定程度上体现了作者扎实的语言功底。